Relationships: Basic Rights

Most of us are aware of verbal abuse and the need to be understood no matter what one’s age or relationship. The recognition of abuse, be it emotional, physical or sexual, and whether it occurred in childhood or adulthood, brings both pain and shock. 

In her book “The Verbally Abusive Relationship,” Patricia Evans lists the basic rights in a relationship, and all those which are violated by verbal abuse (2010, P118-119).

Basic Rights in a Relationship

• The right to goodwill from the other.

• The right to emotional support.

• The right to be heard by your partner and to receive a courteous response.

• The right to have your own opinions, even if the other feels differently.

• The right to have your feelings and experiences recognized as legitimate.

• The right to have a sincere apology for any jokes you find offensive.

• The right to clear and informative responses to questions about your business.

• The right to not have to endure blame or accusations.

• The right to not have to endure judgement or criticism.

• The right to have your interests or business spoken of politely.

• The right to encouragement.

• The right to be safe from physical or emotional threats.

• The right to live free from angry outbursts and rage.

• The right to not be called by derogatory names.

• The right to be asked in a considerate manner rather than outright ordered.

Respect and Goodwill

Everyone needs to feel safe and respected within a relationship. When there is respect and goodwill in a relationship, other issues can be addressed. When there is no verbal abuse there is openness and willingness to discuss hopes, fears, desires, needs and expectations of both parties. 

This report is not a diagnosis. We hope this information can guide you toward improving your life.

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